Story # 3.2

She lifted herself up, ready to move and leave, when she felt his hand touching her forearm.

“Is that coffee for me or are you going to drink it all by yourself?”

She turned back to him. So he had been awake. Why had he pretended otherwise?

“I thought you were asleep,” she tried to call him on it, but he dismissed it.

“Good morning,” he mumbled, kissing her instead.

“Good morning,” she said as well, running her fingers through his hair again, just like she had done before, reassuring herself that he was really there.

“So how many hours of this beautiful day have I missed?” he asked, smiling at her like a child that had just received its Christmas present.

“Someone’s in a particularly good mood,” she noticed. “It’s almost noon.”

“Well, that still leaves us with all afternoon and - I don’t have any plans for tonight.”

“Really?” she teased him, the grin on his face not being lost on her. “But what if I do?”

“What plans would that be?”

“Maybe I have to work?”

“I don’t think your boss would be that mean,” he went along with her their little game. “It’s Sunday.”

“Maybe you don’t know him that well then,” she couldn’t stop herself from saying. “I think he’s perfectly capable of it.”

“Really?” it was his turn to ask, taking the coffee from her to place it somewhere safe. “Then tell me, what else do you think he’s capable of?”

She smiled. She probably knew that better than he did. But deciding that enough had been said she started pulling on his shirt and kissed him. She could think of better things to do than talk right now.

He kissed her back and soon his hands were pulling at her top as well, and she was just about to move into a more comfortable position when she suddenly felt him hesitating.

“What? Not capable of pulling my shirt over my head?” she mocked, but then she saw the expression in his face. Something was wrong. Or maybe not wrong but bothering him. She backed off a little.

“Nina…”

He sounded so serious all of a sudden, enough to make her sit back and bring some distance between them. “What is it?”

“I…I realized something this morning,” he stammered, and she didn’t fail to notice that he avoided her gaze for a moment. So this really was serious. And in the back of her head an alarm went off although she couldn’t figure out yet why.

“Look, I know we’ve been a bit in a limbo here,” he started, and she instantly knew why she was on alert. Don’t go there, Jack, she pleaded inwardly, knowing though that it was in vain. She could see it in his eyes, and thinking about it, she had noticed it when he had first looked at her and smiled, a little wider than usually.

“Or I’ve been,” he continued, and she knew she had to stop him. Maybe she was wrong and this was not what she was afraid it was, but she couldn’t take the risk. It would ruin everything. “But –“

“Jack, before you say anything,” she interrupted, suppressing a feeling of panic because she hadn’t planned for this. Not in detail. She hadn’t thought things had come this far. “There’s something I meant to talk to you about too,” she stalled, having no idea how to make this go away. She just knew she couldn’t have this conversation with him. Not if she was right, not if he was about to tell her that he didn’t want to go back to his family again. Not even if a part of her would like to hear it? No, she told herself. Don’t jeopardize this.

He frowned, obviously not happy about her cutting him off, and knowing he wasn’t a master in expressing his feelings she could understand why. Which only proved her right concerning his intentions.

“Alright. You go first,” he sighed however, always the gentleman, of course.

She nodded and then looked down at her hands, stalling some more to come up with something like a plan. His family. Use his family. It was his Achilles’ heel, his weak spot. It didn’t take a mind-reader to know he felt guilty for being with her instead of Teri and Kim, and she had always been convinced he would go back as soon as Teri asked him too, had never even considered that he would choose her over them. That had been the plan, after all. Or part of it. As far as any of this was just a plan. But lately, there had been some signs. Nothing she could have put her finger on, small things, subtle things. She hadn’t even been sure. But now it seemed she had been all too right. She should have been prepared for this.

“Someone’s been calling me,” she stated, literally making the words up as she said them.

“Who?”

“I don’t know,” she sighed, acting like she wasn’t sure if she should even mention it, buying herself some more time. Every second could help her now. “They hung up.” So far so good. “But I got a feeling…“ Yes, this could be getting her somewhere. “Is it possible that…does Teri know about us?” No, not Teri. She could maybe get Jack to believe that his wife was insecure or suspicious but not that she was as immature as to call and then hang up. Judging by the little she knew from Jack, Teri seemed rather the type who would confront her. So, not Teri. “Or Kim?” she added quickly to correct her mistake.

“No,” Jack exclaimed, puzzlement and shock obvious in his face. Careful now. You have to sell it to him.

“No,” he repeated. “What makes you think that it was one of them?”

“I don’t know.” Did she need a good reason? It would be more convincing but she couldn’t come up with anything. “It’s just a feeling. Call it female intuition.” She couldn’t but roll her eyes. Female intuition? Great. She would have rolled her eyes even if it was true, just for saying it out loud. “But, Jack, it was definitely not someone who had dialed the wrong number,” she hurried to give him something more substantial.

“Alright,” he seemed to buy at least some of it. “But there are still a thousand other possibilities.”

“True.” But? Come on! There had to be something she could use. “But…” Kim called on Jack’s cell, she remembered, not a second too early. “Remember that one time I answered your cell?”

“Nina, we were in my office, I asked you to answer for me, it was completely innocent,” he dismissed her point. “We weren’t even…seeing each other back then.”

True, but she was on to something now. Something she could really use.

“Yeah, I know that, Jack. But do you think Kim saw it that way? It was after you had moved out, and you told me yourself that you thought she’s been acting weird lately.” True again. He had told her that. Things were starting to fall into place, her plan starting to take more concrete shape. And Jack seemed to start swallowing her bait. She could see him mull over it although he tried to dismiss it a moment later.

“She’s a teenager whose parents are separated. I think everybody would act a bit weird in her place.”

She knew she had him exactly where she wanted him. He had already started pondering. She didn’t have to do much more so she kept quiet, just frowned a bit to show she didn’t agree with him.

It seemed to do the trick. Jack was silent for a while, obviously deep in thought.

“Okay, so, let’s say Kim is suspicious and wonders if I’m seeing anyone. Just because you answered my cell once she automatically draws the conclusion that it’s you?”

She shrugged her shoulders, inwardly heaving a sigh of relief though. She was confident now that things would work out. She had done her part, Jack would do the rest on his own.

“I know it’s a long shot, Jack. I just thought you should know that they might know. Or at least have their suspicions.” The only thing she had to take care of now was to keep him from asking himself why she had brought this up. Or from asking her. Just keep him focused on Teri and Kim, she reminded herself, watching how Jack ran a hand through his hair. A clear sign of despair.

“How would she get your number?” he asked, as if to prove her right. It wasn’t a serious question, just a last attempt to find an explanation that wouldn’t throw him into another loop of guilt and compunction.

“Oh, come on, it’s a regular line. I’m listed,” she dismissed it easily. But seeing the sad expression on his face, the pain starting to show in his eyes, she almost found herself overcome by remorse. She knew it was cruel to play him like this, but what choice did she have?

“I just thought you should know,” she repeated, if for no other reason than to distract herself. She couldn’t let him off the hook now. “I might be completely off here, but she’s your daughter, Jack.”

He stared at her and she knew she had won. She didn’t have to fake the sympathy in her eyes though.

“What should I do?” she heard him mutter, and again she couldn’t but feel terrible for doing this to him. But she hadn’t brought this on to him. She hadn’t made him leave Teri, and she hadn’t forced him to get involved with her. In fact, she had been pretty reluctant. At first because she hadn’t been sure if she would be able to control this, if it would be worth the risk, and later on because she had started to care for him. More than she should. Much more than she could allow herself to.

“I don’t know,” she sighed, preparing herself to land the final blow. “Talk to her. Find out what she thinks.”

“I’m not going to interrogate my own daughter,” he objected, sounding a bit aggravated.

“I didn’t mean it that way. I meant find out how she feels about all this. If she’s okay. If she’s coping.” This was it. “Find out what she wants.” He lowered his gaze, unable to look into her eyes, and she knew she had successfully planted the seed that would destroy their…whatever it was they had, that would drive him back to his family. “Just talk to her, Jack.”

“Yeah,” he muttered faintly, and she gave him a few moments to make his conclusions. Despite feeling sorry for him, she couldn’t help but notice how ironic it was that she could manipulate him so easily to leave her and go back to Teri and Kim. She would love to believe that she could have accomplished the same if things had been reversed. That she could have made him abandon them and stay with her. But deep down she was sure that would have been beyond her powers.

It doesn’t matter, she reminded herself. There was no point in tormenting herself like that. Just like there was no point in wondering how things could have been if she hadn’t stopped him from telling her what he had wanted to tell her. How things could have been if she could allow herself to let him get this close to her. If she had made different choices in the past, if one of them was someone else. There simply was no point in that.

“So, what did you wanna talk to me about?” she asked, eager now to get this whole conversation over with. She had been right from the beginning after all – there were better things to do than talk.

“What?” Jack asked, trying hard to hide the emotions raging within him from her. If he only knew how well she knew him.

“You wanted to tell me something,” she offered, but he just shook his head.

“No, it’s…I was just…you wanna go somewhere and have breakfast?”